Well Well Well

I am have been gone for a couple days, but our computer decided it was time to call it quits so we had to get it fixed. Our old computer just couldn't keep up with me blogging! It wanted to die every time I started! I am so happy our new computer is alive and well! Now I can write! So let's see what to write about first!

I feel like I look this big...

Thank the lord that I only have one baby and not 8!!Let the venting begin..

To be honest I don't know whether I should laugh or cry when I look in the mirror every morning. I guess I do both. Pregnancy is a blessing and even though I may look like hell, I feel beautiful. Giving this child life is the most beautiful thing ever. My husband is supportive and sweet. He always tells me I am beautiful and he listens to my complaints. I know deep down he is hoping and praying that one day he will see my youthful honeymoon body again. Yeah, don't think this exists anymore but he can always hope. He would never admit it, but I think all husbands are thinking the same thing. "Please God, let her get back to norm again, but can we keep the new rack?" Just kidding. I love my husband and the way he makes me feel. He holds my hand and lets me cry on his shoulder when nothing fit's anymore. Too bad he doesn't give me a gift certificate to the mall. haha I am to the point now where this monstrous belly is even to big to wear my old sleeping shirts that use to be gigantic on me!! I went to a Dr's apt yesterday, its something I used to love doing because I always love to hear my baby's heartbeat and I like to know everything is going ok. So now I hate it! Let me explain why...

They call my name to go into this little room and I see "it". "It" Has a ton of numbers I like to remind myself that "it" always lies to me and that "it" likes to see me suffer every time I step on it and the numbers used to be low and satisfying. Now the numbers have hit a painful 190. Yes "it" would be the scale. I hate seeing it and I don't dare step on it in my home! I only wait till I go in for a check up so that why I am only depressed for one day a month. Now it will be every 2 weeks that I have to deal with it. I am so said that I have gained so much throughout this pregnancy. Never in a million years did I think I would be 10 pounds from 200. Ugh

Being pregnant sure is a funny little thing. You just don't quite feel yourself. Not only do you cry on demand, but you feel as though your body is being taken over by a little fidgeting alien. I don't think men quite get how it feels to have something constantly trying to claw its way out from the inside. I have my first birthing class tomorrow and I pray that they teach me how not to kill my husband. I am worried that I might during the delivery. My hormones are in full swing and I can turn on someone in just seconds now.

My back is killing me so I guess I am done venting for now. I wonder if my Dr would give me my epidural now?

Shannan